In the Second Letter to the Thessalonians, Paul ends a long, challenging admonition by stating: You must never grow weary of doing what is right. And in his letter to the Galatians, Paul also says: Let us not become weary of doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.
This sounds so simple and yet it cuts to the heart of many of our moral struggles. We give up too soon, give in too soon, and don’t carry our solitude to its highest level. We simply don’t carry tension long enough.
All of us experience tension in our lives: in our families, in our friendships, in our places of work, in our churches, in our communities, and within our conversations around other people, politics, and current events. And, being good-hearted people, we carry that tension with patience, respect, graciousness, and forbearance – for a while!
Then, at a certain point we feel ourselves stretched to the limit, grow weary of doing what is right, feel something snap inside of us, and hear some inner voice say: Enough! I’ve put up with this too long! I won’t tolerate this anymore!
We let go of patience, respect, graciousness, and forbearance, either by venting and giving back in kind or simply by fleeing the situation with an attitude of good riddance. Either way, we refuse to carry the tension any longer.
But that exact point, when we have to choose between giving up or holding on, carrying tension or letting it go, is a crucial moral site, one that determines character: Big-heartedness, nobility of character, deep maturity, and spiritual sanctity often manifest themselves around these questions: How much tension can we carry? How great is our patience and forbearance? How much can we put up with?
Of course this comes with a caveat: Carrying tension does not mean carrying abuse. Jesus loved, challenged, and absorbed tension in a way that took away the sins of the world. We know that no matter how noble our intention, when we absorb abuse as opposed to challenging it, we don’t take away the sin, we enable it.
Men and women are noble of character precisely when they can walk with patience, respect, graciousness, and forbearance amid crushing and unfair tensions, when they never grow weary of doing what is right.
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